Helmet hair can be super embarrassing, right?
Sure, there are ways to fix it.
But there’s no way to prevent it in the first place.
The fact is, once you strap that motorcycle helmet onto your head, you’re in a crapshoot.
Anything could happen to your hair now.
And by the time you take your helmet off at the end of the ride, who knows what horrors you’ll reveal?
If you’ve ever spent more than 10 minutes on a motorcycle, you know this is true.
How many rides have you been on where you hope you brought your little travel hairbrush with you?
And maybe your emergency helmet hair repair kit?
Lots, right?
Yep, me too.
But let’s keep this in perspective.
When it comes right down to it, helmet hair is not herpes.
So what can you do but laugh when it happens?
Let’s have a little fun with the ongoing horrors of motorcycle helmet hair.
Who better to model some common motorcycle helmet hair disasters than dogs?
They share our love of adventure – AND remind us that a sense of humor can usually help you feel better.
Helmet hair on a motorcycle is embarrassing – but unavoidable. While there are ways to fix it, the first line of defence is a sense of humor. These dog models showcase some of the most common kinds of motorcycle helmet hair – how many do you recognise?
10 Helmet Hair Issues Kindly Modelled By Dogs
So let’s see if these dogs can make us smile about the shame of helmet hair…
1. Helmet hair can be flatter than a pancake
The flat look is probably the most common type of motorcycle helmet hair.
Hair like this is so flat it’s like a pressed flower in a book.
Except maybe not so pretty.
Back when you left the house, your hair was bouncy, and full of volume.
But your motorcycle helmet has absorbed all that lift.
Now your hair looks like you went a little nuts with the hair straighteners – but only at the roots.
2. Helmet hair causes bangs disasters
Pulling a motorcycle helmet over ANY kind of hair will create problems.
But if you have bangs, you’re in for a special treat.
How do you make it to the end of a motorcycle ride without your bangs either stuck to your forehead or sticking up in weird directions?
Yep, it’s a tricky one.
And it’s such an issue that I’ve written a whole post about helmet hair and bangs right here.
You’re welcome.
3. Helmet hair is even worse when your bangs are long
Yep, bangs that are short or medium length are a challenge, for sure.
But what if you have longer bangs that you usually sweep to the side of your forehead?
The danger here is that you might reach the end of a motorcycle ride looking a little like a wool blind sheep.
OK, at least long bangs don’t stick up straight and make you look like you slept on your face in a park.
But they’re probably as flat as the rest of your hair.
You might wonder for a moment if you somehow went blind during the ride.
4. Helmet hair makes curls into a gamble
Curly hair is wildly unpredictable at the best of times, right?
If your hair is extremely curly, you may just be able to triumph over the flattening power of the motorcycle helmet.
But it’s hard to say.
You might come out with some sections of curls flattened, and other parts sticking straight up.
Or if the wind’s gotten under your helmet (do you have a flip top helmet where the whole front of the helmet lifts up, by any chance?) you might end up with more volume than you can handle.
But, look, ANY amount of volume is a miracle at this point.
I wouldn’t complain if I was you.
5. Helmet hair is not fixed with color
Surely a pop of color will make up for any helmet hair disasters, right?
Bright hair color is individual, and fresh.
It’s funky; it’s confident.
Yes, it is.
Until your hair has been flattened under a motorcycle helmet.
Because you’ll still have helmet hair.
But yours will be bright blue as well.
So people will definitely look twice now.
But this might not be kind of attention you like.
6. Helmet hair doesn’t want to be styled
Ever tried to ‘style’ your hair underneath the motorcycle helmet?
Maybe if you push it to the side and tuck it under, it’ll come out with a bit of shape at the end of a ride?
Yeah, maybe.
Or maybe you’ll just end up running for President instead.
If you’d like to be the leader of the free world, it could be worth a try.
7. Helmet hair makes waves utterly random
Was your hair a little wavy before you pulled on your motorcycle helmet?
Maybe – just maybe – some of those waves might still be there at the end of the ride.
But a motorcycle helmet is quite a creative stylist.
So unfortunately, the roots of your hair are now flat.
And the wavy parts have gone rogue.
Some of the curls have dropped out.
Other curls are sticking out at quirky angles.
It looks like you took to your hair with a curling iron in the dark.
8. Helmet hair means layers are no longer cool
Lots of choppy layers in your hair look pretty rock’n’roll, right?
Sure.
Most of the time.
But after an hour in a motorcycle helmet, those flattened layers have all gone in directions of their own.
The look has somehow mutated from Joan Jett into Day Release Patient.
9. Helmet hair turns short and spiky into short and flat
Short hair that’s layered is often lifted with a hair dryer and plenty of product.
It’s usually a little tousled, or ruffled.
It’s effortlessly messy.
Not anymore.
Those edgy spikes are now flattened back against your head.
Suddenly you look a lot like your Uncle Eddie who honestly believes his comb-over looks great.
10. Helmet hair is made worse by hair accessories
Maybe this is a good time to try and dress up your hair with a few clips or bows.
It might add some volume or help to keep your hair in place.
It can’t hurt, right?
Actually, it can.
In two ways.
Firstly, clips and bobby pins can stick into your head for the whole ride and drive you crazy.
And secondly, you can GUARANTEE those little clip-in flowers won’t be where you left them when you take off your motorcycle helmet.
Because under a motorcycle helmet, hair accessories somehow come to life.
They have the power to move around your head to wherever they want.
It doesn’t matter that you carefully arranged them this morning.
Take off your helmet, and a shower of little metal flowers will fall on the ground.
Some will be dangling from your hair like Christmas tree ornaments, suspended in knots caused by rubbing against your head.
Others will be threatening to just abandon ship completely, and fall in your ear.
Suddenly you look like someone’s crazy aunt who’s been let out of the attic for the day.
Helmet Hair is a Challenge, For Sure
But maybe if we try and keep a sense of humor, we can survive the crippling shame of having less than perfect hair.
And don’t forget the reason why this bad hair day happened in the first place…
You’re out having the time of your life on a motorcycle.
With any luck, you’re too busy having the most fun ever to bother worrying about your hair!
Like this article?
Then you might also be interested in:
Motorcycle Dogs & Motorcycle Men – 10 Ways They’re Exactly Alike!
