Motorcycle selfies are like family photos.

You need a lot of them, and they always make you smile.

And motorcycles beg to be photographed.
They’re gorgeous – and always look great in pictures.

It doesn’t matter whether they’re sparkling clean, or covered in mud.
If they’re caked in dirt, that means they’re just back from an adventure.
And if they’re freshly washed, the sun bounces off the chrome and makes the tank glitter.
Of course you need to take a photo.

And naturally enough, you need to be in it too.
But that usually poses a few more problems, right?

Because for most of us, it’s not as easy to look as pretty as a motorcycle.
Personally I’m happy if I don’t end up looking like a farm animal.
Is my nose really so big?
And how did I get grass on my face?

 

Great motorcycle selfies start with a little planning.
It helps to find flattering natural light, and apply some simple motorcycle makeup.
You’ll need to take a million photos, and have a sense of humor about not looking perfect.
And keeping poses simple works best.

I admit it: I’ve always hated having my photo taken.

It’s a semi-phobia that goes way back.

Recently I found a photo of me as a child on holiday with the family.
Standing by the motel pool in the blinding sunshine of an Australian summer, I’ve clearly been told to smile for the photo.
So there I am in my child’s bikini: hands on hips, head defiantly tilted to the side, and openly scowling at the camera.
I’m like a world-famous rapper in the body of a four year old girl.

The photo makes me laugh now, but, oh, my poor parents…

Fast forward to the grownup me, and I still don’t love taking a photo.
But at least now I work harder to hide my natural crankiness.
Most of the time.

Motorcycle Selfies Bring Special Challenges

Even if you don’t have a weird thing about photos that goes all the way back to your childhood, we’re facing some special challenges with motorcycle selfies.

Whether you ride on the front or the back of a bike, motorcycles are a messy business.
There are a whole range of obstacles to taking a good photo.

 

Such as: wind, dirt, rain, sweat, sunburn.
And don’t forget melting makeup and the unavoidable helmet hair.

It’s 1,000 selfie challenges all at the same time.
So how can biker chicks get photo-ready?

Don’t worry.
I’ve figured this out the hard way.

Here are my best selfie ideas for taking good motorcycle photos – without looking like you’re possibly part werewolf.

10 Motorcycle Selfie Ideas Just for Motorcycle Women

With a little planning, you can take better photos – and the more you practice, the easier it gets.

1.  Take the selfie BEFORE the ride

You know that feeling at the start of a ride.
You’re grinning like a maniac.
Energy levels are high.
Helmet hair is hours away.

You even have lipstick on.

This is the best you’re going to look today.
Quick – take the photo now.

 

2.  Motorcycle makeup

Speaking of lipstick, whether you normally wear makeup or not, a little cosmetic help can really improve how your motorcycle selfie turns out.

I share my super-quick motorcycle makeup routine over here.
It includes an explanation of why you don’t need 500 products and false eyelashes.

I do wear makeup normally (the world’s not ready for the alternative, trust me).
And I’ve found you can just simplify your usual routine a little so that your makeup will survive even a long ride.

That way, you won’t end up looking like a smeared clown who’s lost her way to a children’s party.

3.  Bright light helps (believe it or not)

Selfies taken on sunny days just seem to come out better.
Natural, bright glowing light is ideal.
You don’t get weird shadows on your face that make you look like an extra on a horror movie.

But don’t squint into direct sunlight, unless you want to look 35 years older.
Try standing with the sun directly behind your head; this can create a flattering halo effect.

I’ve found that in summer here in New Zealand, there’s what I think of as The Golden Hour.
Around 5pm there’s often a wonderful yellowish glow to the quality of light.

If I’m not already looking like a walrus after a long ride, that’s the time of day to snap a selfie – it’s the most flattering light, which makes me look younger and almost serene.

So it’s a complete illusion of course, but I’ll take it.

 

 

4.  Don’t stress about the equipment

Motorcycle selfies are likely to be taken on the spur of the moment.

If you’re poking around under the bed trying to find the GoPro setup you bought last year, that perfect moment in the garage will be lost.

Be spontaneous, and grab whatever photo-capable device is to hand.
So keep your phone and even your camera within reach when motorcycle activities are afoot.

It doesn’t hurt to have a selfie stick around, either.
Yes, we laugh at the tourists using them when we’re on road trips, but they do make it easier to create a little distance between you and the camera lens.

5.  Break out your sense of humor

There’s only one way to look perfect next to a motorcycle.

You’ll need to park one in a photographer’s studio, and hire about 15 professionals to invest 4 hours trying to make you look like a supermodel.

Back in the real world, no-one looks perfect.
And if you’re anywhere near a motorcycle, you probably look a lot messier and dirtier than you do normally.

Real biker women can laugh about the challenges of trying to look pretty in all that motorcycle gear.
Even so, here are a few practical tips on how to look good on a motorcycle.

Understand that your hair won’t be spilling over your shoulders in sleek movie-star waves.
You may have actual dirt on your face, and under your nails.
You won’t be looking red-carpet perfect.

But if you’re smiling, it won’t matter.
Your camera will capture joy, and that always looks good.

In my case, one of the biker cats will likely photobomb the pic anyway, so you may as well laugh.
(Hector, aren’t you supposed to be guarding the bikes?)

 

6.  Accept you’ll need to take 2 million photos

How many times in your life have you taken a great motorcycle selfie with one click?
Personally, I never have.
Ever.

It’s not like taking photos of our biker cats.
They’re super relaxed, and naturally photogenic.

So here’s what I do when it comes to motorcycle selfies.

Take about a million photos, and then sift through them for the gold.
Yep, you’ll be needing a sense of humor here, too, believe me.

Go through the pics, and delete:

• Blurry shots of who-knows-what (is that an alien spacecraft in the background)?
• Dark spooky photos that look like Dracula’s after-party
• Photos of you and the motorcycle in public that somehow include some passing guy’s backside, and
• Anything that makes you look like you’re part way into that werewolf transformation.

7.  Take some motorcycle selfies with your significant other

It drives me crazy that I need to take a billion motorcycle selfies to get one or two good photos.

But the hubby gets off the bike at the end of a long ride, slightly sunburned, his beard churned up by the wind, looking completely wild.

I’ve gotta get a photo of this! I say.
He grins at me obligingly, and click!
He’s just posed for a natural, fantastic photo.
In one take.
Super annoying.
He’s not even wearing makeup.

I try and take advantage of his relaxed approach by hoping some of it will rub off on me.
Sometimes I’ll snap a motorcycle selfie of us as a couple.
Interestingly, the selfies I’ve taken of us together are much more natural and relaxed, and come out great.

So try that, if your partner makes you smile and relax.
It will definitely come across in the photo.

 

 

8.  Motorcycles are the ultimate photo prop

A motorcycle is more than a ticket to freedom.

It’s a beautiful, two-wheeled work of art.
So it’s the perfect photo accessory.

But how do you get the motorcycle – and you – in the same photo?
Well, for a start, keep it simple.

Forget about trying the kinds of poses you see online.
You know the ones: the flawless biker chick babes lying semi-naked across a motorcycle, with forced smiles, pretending they’re about to go riding in black lace underpants.

Oh, man.
Let’s try and keep it real here.

Attach your phone to a selfie stick, keep most of your clothes on, and try these motorcycle selfie poses:

• Sitting on the bike: the front seat, the pillion seat, and side saddle
• Kneeling on the ground and leaning into the tank
• Sitting next to the wheel,
• In your helmet with the visor open, or even
• Using the garage as a backdrop.

Move your arm in an arc, and try different angles: look up, sideways, and straight into the camera.
Bring the phone in closer, then try it further away.
You’ll need to take hundreds of pics, remember?
So click, click, click from different angles for a few minutes at a time, and then see which ones look best.

9.  Take off some layers

If you’re heading out on a motorcycle ride, you’ll be wearing several layers of gear, topped by a weatherproof jacket.

Good thinking.
The right motorcycle safety gear could save your life.

But all that gear doesn’t photograph well.
Too often in photos, you’ll look like a shapeless giant blob with a possibly human head.

So – just for the motorcycle selfie – lose some of the 17 layers of protective gear.
I don’t mean stop by the side of the road, and strip down to your underwear.
As we know, real biker women don’t suddenly have their clothes fall off when a motorcycle pulls up next to them.

But you’ll be more comfortable smiling in your favourite motorcycle t-shirt.
And that’ll show in the selfie.

 

 

10.  Don’t forget a final edit

What are the chances your photo will be framed just right, and be clear and bright?
For me, the odds are zero.

Maybe the day’s turned cloudy and the photo’s good, but a little too dark.
Or I haven’t noticed that massive ugly yellow recycling bin looming in the background.

That’s when you need some editing software to make an OK photo into something better.
I use Befunky.com – it’s free, and really easy to crop out elements you don’t want, and brighten up the lighting if you need to.

By the way, I don’t recommend photo-shopping your head onto a 20-year-old’s body.
Or polishing your face until you look like a terrifying life-size plastic doll.

But a more balanced, brighter photo is easily achievable.

So there you have it: a very quick guide to taking better motorcycle selfies – just for biker chicks.

Now the motorcycle’s not the only one that looks good in the garage!

 

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