Biker dating involves more than zooming down the open road in the sunshine together.
Sooner or later, you’ll both need to eat.
And so dating a biker often involves going out for dinner.
Well, that’s not a problem, right?
You’ve been to a restaurant before.
You know how a menu works.
Sure.
But have you ever sat down to dinner with a biker?
Because if you haven’t, there are a few things you need to know.
Dating a biker could involve going out for dinner on your first date.
You want the evening to be fun and relaxed – not awkward.
Here’s how to make sure your first biker date is a big success…
Dating a Biker: 5 Ways to Have a Great First Dinner
1. Don’t suggest somewhere really fancy
Chances are you’ll be arriving at the restaurant on the back of a motorcycle.
That can be a problem if the restaurant is very fancy.
Because you’ll be wearing jeans and a leather jacket.
OK, you might be have a show-stopping glittery top under all that motorcycle gear.
But that won’t help with first impressions when you arrive at the upscale restaurant.
And to get to the pretty, feminine layer of clothing, you’ll need to shed your:
- leather jacket
- woolly sweater
- scarf, and
- riding gloves.
You’ll need to find somewhere to stash your motorcycle helmet.
And you’d better pray the ride wasn’t long enough to bring on an embarrassing case of motorcycle helmet hair.
So by the time you take off layer after layer of motorcycle safety gear and actually sit down, you’ll already have provided the evening’s entertainment.
But the audience is a restaurant full of snooty diners who won’t enjoy the show.
The wait staff will also be judging you.
I’ve never heard a snobby waiter say to me: Can I take your motorcycle helmet for you, madam?
And at a swanky restaurant, the dress code is only half the problem.
Chances are the menu itself will also be an issue.
Do you really want to get to know each other over some weird pretentious food that neither of you can identify?
It won’t help the vibe when your biker date calls the waiter and asks why someone has sneezed on his dinner…
Only to discover that the nasty looking green bubbles are actually avocado foam.
Or possibly “deconstructed” green peas.
You’d better hope you both have a massive shared sense of humor.
If you do, you’ll be able to laugh at those little random blobs of color on your plate that are claiming to be food.
It’s a better idea to just go somewhere a little more casual where you can be yourselves.
Why make the getting-to-know-you process more awkward than it has to be?
If you find yourself saying: What the hell is THAT? – when dinner arrives, you’re probably in the wrong restaurant for a first biker date.
2. It’s too soon for a biker bar
A bar’s usually pretty laid-back and casual.
And plenty of bars serve dinner, right?
So why not grab a burger at a biker bar?
Well, this is a bad idea for a couple reasons.
For starters, bars are about drinking first and foremost.
So naturally you might jump right in with a few quick shots, right?
Especially if you’re a little nervous.
And then, sure, the conversation will flow more easily.
The biker date will be off to a great start.
But do you really want to get on the back of a motorcycle with someone who’s had JUST enough tequila to try being a motorcycle stunt rider on the way home?
Yeah, probably not.
Then there’s the issue of your fellow diners.
If everyone’s getting a little loud, your first date is about to be crashed by the drunk bikers at the next table.
One of them will be very excited to talk about the 5,000 details of his latest Harley rebuild with your date.
After hearing the breakdown of what happened over 12 hours in a stranger’s garage, you’ll be hopping mad.
And an argument on the first date is not ideal.
You can navigate your way through motorcycle culture later.
Right now, just get to know the guy a little bit.
Preferably on neutral territory.
3. Avoid all-you-can-eat night
Dating a biker is refreshing for many reasons.
One of them is that bikers often prefer real women.
They’re not expecting you to look like a hungry teenager who’s, like, totally obsessed with fitting into size zero jeans, you know?
So you don’t need to pretend that you eat like a rabbit.
A few salad leaves is all you need, right?
Maybe a carrot if you’re feeling really reckless…
Nah, you can drop that act.
Bikers want a woman who’s up for motorcycle-based adventure.
You can’t be a part of that if you’re weak with hunger.
You won’t be any fun if you’re cranky because your stomach is growling.
So it’s fine to order an actual full meal on a biker date.
But that advice comes with one warning…
This may not be the moment to go with a full 8 course Viking banquet.
You don’t want to be so busy digesting that you can’t have a conversation.
The evening will cruise to a silent stop as you slip slowly into a sleepy food coma.
Your gentle snoring at the table won’t impress the other diners – or your biker date.
And bear in mind you’ll need to climb back onto the motorcycle when dinner’s over.
That can be a challenge if you’ve eaten half a sheep, 3 goats and a big slice of chocolate cake.
Even if you CAN wake up from the coma in time, that kind of digestion challenge will make for a pretty uncomfortable ride home.
You’ll have to climb onto a motorcycle, remember, rather than be rolled gently onto a Viking ship.
4. Don’t try sheep’s testicles for the first time
Now and then you discover you have a food allergy.
Generally the only way to find this out is to try a dish you’ve never had before.
Then, while you’re throwing up noisily in the restaurant bathroom, you figure out that, hey, you must be allergic to sheep’s testicles.
This happened to me early on in my romantic relationship with my own biker, who of course is now my husband.
He’s a brave man, what can I tell you?
Only my experience involved seafood rather than the genitals of a sheep.
Early on in our relationship we went out for pizza in this fantastic Italian restaurant.
The seafood pizza looks good! Pat said.
It sure does! I love seafood, I replied.
It has mussels on it, he warned. Do you like mussels?
Never tried them! I replied happily, with not a care in the world.
And so we shared the seafood pizza.
We had a wonderful evening, chatting and laughing (which we still do).
And then we got home.
Where I suddenly discovered that I’m seriously allergic to mussels.
I mean SERIOUSLY allergic.
Any other seafood is fine – but mussels are a nightmare for me.
What an awesome way to find that out…
By vomiting constantly for the next 10 hours in front of my new boyfriend.
Pat was kind enough to bring me a bucket.
But it wasn’t our most romantic evening ever.
So steer clear of anything you’ve never tried before.
There’ll be time to be adventurous with food several dates down the line.
But driving the porcelain bus on the first date tends to kill the mood.
5. Try not to be high maintenance
When dating a biker for the first time, it’s helpful to not look like a brat.
If you have a genuine food allergy issue, then explain that to the waiter.
Be polite and reasonable.
But don’t be high maintenance without a very good reason.
If you can’t order dinner without demanding that the chef has to:
- substitute the fries for a baked potato
- put the low fat salad dressing on the side
- only use organic tomatoes, and
- make sure the goat’s cheese comes from a particular Greek island…
Well, it might be better if YOU do the cooking.
Or just go for coffee if dinner’s going to be that hard.
Because while you’re deep in complicated negotiations with the waiter about something as simple as dinner, here’s what your biker date will be thinking.
If she’s this high maintenance in a restaurant, how will she be on a motorcycle?
Riding on the back of a motorcycle involves being adaptable.
You’ll have to go with the flow.
Conditions won’t always be perfect.
So if you can’t even order dinner without a lot of drama, your biker will be losing interest in you by the minute.
Just choose something that looks good from the menu, and start chatting.
You can fuss over whether the salad dressing is too oily, or why you hate olives on the fourth date, when you know each other better.
Keep it simple for now, and see if there’s even going to be a second date.
That’s what this dinner is about.
Not which river the salmon came from.
The princess act generally won’t go down very well.
Dating a Biker Means Being Real
Dating a biker is a rare opportunity.
It’s a chance to be yourself, and connect with another genuine person who’s interesting and adventurous.
Bikers often appreciate down to earth, real women who don’t live to create drama and need constant attention.
And after a few dates, you’ll know each other better and be able to laugh together.
So sure, THEN you can try that trendy new restaurant where the food looks like frothy pink bubble bath served in test tubes.
That could be fun (especially if you know a good food van where you can get some actual dinner afterwards).
But get to know each other first.
Prove that you’re capable of having a great dinner together.
With any luck, the food on your biker date will be fantastic.
And the company will be even better.
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