Why do people think parking a motorcycle in the living room is so strange?

Our friends always burst out laughing when we open the door, and there’s a bike.
But we’ve had a range of motorcycles in the house over the years.
(There’s a Triumph Thruxton in the living room right now.)
It seems pretty normal to us.
Because here’s the thing…

Keeping a motorcycle in the house has many benefits. It’s not just a beautiful addition to your living room – it can be useful too! It can be a bar, a bookshelf, or even a toy box. It’s now harder to steal, and it’s an inspiring work of art you can enjoy even when you’re not riding it. 

It’s totally practical to keep a motorcycle in your living room.
Don’t believe me?
Well, here’s all the proof you’ll ever need…

21 Practical Uses For A Motorcycle in the House

1.  You’re living in your own art gallery

Let’s start with the most obvious reason to keep a motorcycle in your living room.
Motorcycles are crazy beautiful.

The lines, the shapes, the colors, all those perfectly designed moving parts…
A motorcycle is a piece of gleaming metal sculpture that takes your breath away.

Now you wouldn’t leave a Picasso locked away in the garage, would you?
Exactly.
It’s too beautiful – and too valuable.

So it’s also a crying shame to leave a magnificent motorcycle under a cover in the shed.

It should be in your house, where you can gaze happily at the work of art you can ride.

 

2.  Simple bike maintenance jobs just got easier

OK, so you might not want to change the oil on the new Persian rug.
But there are plenty of smaller maintenance jobs you can take care of in the comfort of your living room.

You can do minor spanner work, charge the battery, check for loose nuts and bolts – or even upgrade the pillion seat (hey, here’s another way to convince the wife that a motorcycle in the living room benefits her too).

Speaking of wives…

3.  Your relationship benefits (yes, really)

Humor me for a minute on this one.

Does your wife complain that you spend all your time in the garage?
Well, here’s the solution.

With an indoor motorcycle, you can hang out with your wife and your bike at the same time.

It’s a lot cheaper than couples therapy.
And nowhere near as annoying.

4.  Security is now locked up tight

It’s a lot harder for thieves to get to your motorcycle when it’s in your house.
If you’re sitting on it while you have dinner, you’ll probably notice if someone’s trying to steal it.

Now you don’t have to set out on paranoid shed patrols at midnight. You don’t have to keep 4 padlocks on your bike, and check the garage door is still triple locked.

You’d have to be in a coma to have a motorcycle stolen from your living room in the night.

And if you have a gang of biker cats keeping watch, your motorcycle is even more secure. You’ll sleep more soundly than you ever have in your life.

 

5.  Who needs antidepressants now?

An indoor motorcycle is a guaranteed mood lifter.

Let’s say you have a terrible day at work.
Coming home to be greeted by your waiting motorcycle may be the only thing that can make you feel better.

Or maybe your cranky mother-in-law is coming for the weekend.
Seeing the bike proudly sitting by the dining table will automatically irritate her.
You don’t have to do a thing (except smile when you see her reaction).

Jehovah’s Witnesses at the door?
They probably think maniacs who who treat their living room as a garage are beyond saving. I doubt they’ll be back.

Any addition to the household that makes you feel better is surely a good thing.

 

6.  Motorcycles become the focus of daily life, not the background

When your bike’s out in the shed, you have to set aside some Garage Time.
Your everyday obligations often get in the way of that.
And so motorcycles automatically drop lower (and lower) in your daily priorities.

But if your motorcycle’s right in front of you, your thoughts turn to bikes first – and often.

Now you’ll find yourself planning your next road trip, ordering that part you meant to source months ago, and making sure you’re registered for the annual motorcycle rally that you nearly forgot about.

7.  Motorcycle photos are now effortless

Are all your bike photos out of date, blurry, or feature the random and seriously unattractive backsides of passing strangers?

Some better photos of your bike would be great, right?
But it’s tricky to find the right moment to take them.

You’re either out riding that fantastic machine, or it’s parked in the garage where it’s a bit dark, and it’s hard to find a good angle.

But that changes if your motorcycle is in the living room.

Now you can walk around it and set up the perfect shot.
You can sit – or even lie on the floor – to get a close-up of the motor.

 

 

This is also the perfect chance for a motorcycle selfie.

It’s much easier to take a good photo of yourself under these conditions – bright light, total privacy, no helmet hair, no wild wind or rain, and no ugly cars to ruin the shot.

8.  It’s a source of motivation

Coming face to face with your motorcycle first thing in the morning is a great way to start your day.

What else could convince you that it’s worth dealing with another 8 hours in the workforce?

You might have the Monday Horrors, but the job is what pays for the next motorcycle part you just can’t live without, right?

That kind of motivation is as good as having your own life coach.

9.  Now you have more room in your garage

A motorcycle in the house opens up space in your shed.

Now you can see what’s really going on out there.
You’ll probably unearth historical treasures you thought were gone forever.

You might even track down some of those long-lost tools that disappear into the fifth dimension when you’re working on your bike.

You can get some other garage projects done, clear out some clutter, and…
Hey wait…!

Turns out there’s plenty of room out there for another motorcycle!

10.  It works as a toy box

If you’re sick of the kids leaving their toys all over the house, put the motorcycle to work as a toy box.

It’s a lot more fun than shouting “pick up your mess” 25 times a day.

 

11.  Skyrocket your coolness rating

Clearly, motorcycles are jaw-droppingly beautiful.
But they’re way more than eye candy.

I’m betting an indoor motorcycle is also the coolest thing in your house.

It really doesn’t matter what else is around: a leather sofa, a polished wooden dining table, chrome barstools.
That’s all just furniture.

This is a motorcycle.
There’s no contest.

Your house just got 100% cooler – without having to buy something new.
The house looks better AND you’ve saved some cash with zero effort.

12.  It’s a social activity that appeals to everyone

When your bike’s inside, visitors will want to interact with it.
How can they resist?

Your friends who don’t ride will jump at the chance to sit on a real live motorcycle.

This is the opportunity of a lifetime for them to imagine being a biker.
It’s all the excitement with none of the risk.

Even Andy, the super-cool car lover who usually sneers at bikes, will get involved. He’ll throw his leg over the seat, casually twisting the throttle to see what it feels like.

Hey! This is FUN!
Yes. Yes, it is.
It’s a lot more entertaining than a game of Scrabble, that’s for sure.

13.  It charms women completely

If the wife is still looking dubious about this whole motorcycle in the house thing, try using your bike as a vase.

This is a whole new way to display flowers.
It’s wild, it’s funny, it’s romantic.

99% of women will smile when you use the bike as a way to give them flowers.
Genius, right?
It’d definitely work on me.

 

14.  It provides extra seating

A motorcycle in the house is not cluttering up the space, or getting in the way of everyday life.

Far from it.

Park it next to your dining table, and your bike becomes an extra seat.
Guests will fight for the privilege of eating dinner on the bike.
Just don’t let them dribble any gravy on the gas tank.

15.  A temporary bookshelf

We happen to have a huge collection of vintage motorcycle magazines.
They’re full of information that actually takes longer to find on Google.

Of course, it can still take a while to hunt through your old-school magazines for that write-up on the 1980 Triumph Bonneville when it first came out. But you find some fantastic other stuff while you’re looking.

And until you track down that original article, you’ll want to have those magazines within easy reach.

Well, you’re in luck.
You just found the perfect temporary bookshelf.

 

16.  A new way to stay organized

Taping To Do lists to your fridge is so boring.
An indoor motorcycle offers a better way to create order in your life.

You’ll never walk past the bike without looking at it.
So if there’s a list stuck to it, you’ll spot it every time.

Now you’ll always remember to pick up milk, something for dinner, and of course the really important stuff…
Jewellery for your wife.

17.  More shelf space

Ever noticed that clutter has a life of its own?

Look away for a minute, and the mess has somehow already spread to the next available surface. Unless you’re OCD-level tidy, you always need another place to put your stuff.

A motorcycle in the house is the perfect solution.
It offers some temporary storage space just when you need it.

Don’t look now, but the bike is effectively solving a clutter problem, not adding to it.

18.  An eco-friendly clothes dryer

When you’re parked up in the living room, you don’t need your dryer.
What an easy way to save the planet.

Hang your t-shirts or a wet towel on the handlebars before you head out to work in the morning. They’ll be dry by the time you get home – without using one cent worth of electricity.

Your carbon footprint just got smaller.
Yep, you’re pretty much an eco warrior now.

 

19.  A defence against telemarketers

If, like me, you still have a landline (shocker, huh?) you’ll know what it’s like to be harassed by pushy telemarketers.
Well, you’ve just found the best way to avoid them.

With a bike in the way, there’s no way to get to the phone in a hurry.

Now when the phone rings there’s hardly any point in rushing over to answer it, is there? By the time you clamber around the bike, the phone will have stopped ringing.

So let the telemarketers do their worst.
Your evening time is being fiercely guarded by a motorcycle.

20.  A mini-bar

What better way to get the party started?
An indoor bike is the natural center of any sophisticated gathering.
Especially if it involves tequila or bourbon.

But once you’ve mixed the drinks, step away from the motorcycle.
Splashes of Jack Daniels can make gas tanks real sticky.

21.  Another way for the pets to get in the way

Our gang of biker cats often whine about needing new places to nap for 7 hours.
It’s not enough to take up the whole couch, the middle of the floor, or the entire bed.

But now they have a new, massively inconvenient place to sleep.

 

 

So there you have it: 21 very good reasons to stop hiding your motorcycle in the garage.

I’m betting that by now, you’re probably convinced this is a pretty great idea.

But what about the wife?
Some women are oddly unreasonable on this topic.

What if the Wife Says NO to Having a Motorcycle in the House?

Personally, obviously, I love having the bike indoors.
It makes the whole house look better.
But let’s face it, I’m not exactly normal.

Many women will think this is the craziest, stupidest idea ever.
So if your partner falls into this category, what can you do?

How to Answer the Most Common Objections to Keeping a Motorcycle in the Living Room

There are 5 likely obstacles you’ll be facing here.
Here’s how to deal with them.

• • She says: The bike smells! It’s dirty!
    You say: I’ve checked it for leaks.
    I’ve washed and polished it.
    It’s perfectly clean.

• • She says: There’s not enough room!
    You say: Let’s put it over here, away from the doorway.
    There’s plenty of space around it.

• • She says: It’ll wreck the carpet!
    You say: I’m not planning any indoor racing.
    It’s not leaking any fluids.
    I have a clean tarp here that I’ll carefully set up under the bike.
    It won’t be touching the carpet.

• • She says: You wouldn’t keep a car in the house!
    You say: I would if the house was big enough.
    (And if the car was as cool as my bike.)

And you need to finish this discussion strongly.
Try this magical line…

How about we try it for a couple days, and see what you think?

Before you know it, a week has passed.
Then two…
And having breakfast with your bike becomes the new normal.

So Why Wait? Park Your Motorcycle in the Living Room Right Now!

Add all this together, and you have a pretty convincing argument.

Indoor parking is NOT a completely insane idea.
It’s practical – AND inspiring.
This work of art on two wheels helps your whole household to run more smoothly.

So all up, it’s pretty obvious, huh?
There are a million great reasons to keep a motorcycle in your living room.

 

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