There’s a fine art to biker dating.
It really helps if you don’t see the motorcycle as The Enemy.
Because that’s the path to more arguments than you ever dreamed you could fit into an average week.
Bikers love their motorcycles with a fierce, burning passion.
That’s just the way it is.
The motorcycle is a non-negotiable presence in their lives.
Don’t believe me?
Just try any of these comments, and watch the sparks fly.
You might want to have a bag packed and a plane ticket booked before you do…
20 Things to NEVER Say When Dating a Biker
1. Your garage really needed a makeover!
2. It’s like you have another woman out in the garage.
You spend more time out there with HER than you do with me!
3. You’ll never get ME on that death machine!
Motorcycles are so dangerous – I don’t know what you see in them… (etc. etc. etc. etc.)…
4. You know, I think you love that motorcycle more than you love me.
You know, I’ve noticed that you have more photos of your bike than of me…
5. You spent HOW MUCH on new pipes for your motorcycle?
Were the old pipes broken – or what?
6. I went through your old bike t-shirts and gave a whole pile to charity.
Some of them actually had holes in them!
I don’t know why you were hanging onto them.
7. Why would you possibly need another bike?
No-one needs more than one motorcycle, surely!
8. Do you ever actually read those bike magazines?
Why don’t we recycle them and get rid of some of this clutter?
9. Let’s just get rid of the bike and can get a car we can BOTH enjoy?
It’s really selfish of you to keep spending money on the bike when we need a new car.
10. Of course you can’t bring the bike into the house!
Leave it in the garage where it belongs.
What’s wrong with you?
11. If you didn’t keep wasting all that money on your motorcycle, we could actually take a vacation.
Why don’t we stop wasting money on the bike, and start saving to go away on a romantic holiday?
Just the two of us.
No, not on the bike.
12. I want to put the car in the garage…
So you’ll have to start parking the bike in the drive way from now on.
13. I can’t believe I even LET you have a motorcycle.
You really don’t deserve me, you know…
14. I saw a guy on a bike today nearly get himself killed.
I hope you never go too fast or split lanes of traffic.
(This one works GREAT as an ice-breaker on a first biker date.)
15. Do your friends have to come around here on their bikes?
They’re so noisy and the neighbours keep giving me dirty looks, like it’s my fault.
16. Don’t you have any t-shirts that are not motorcycle-related?
I wish you’d wear a proper shirt when we go out to dinner.
17. Isn’t it time you grew out of motorcycles, and just got a car?
You’re not 21 anymore, you know!
18. Does your bike have to be that noisy?
There has to be some way of making it quieter.
19. You just want a motorcycle because you’re having a mid-life crisis.
(With this line, your first biker date will be your last, by the way.)
And one of my all-time favorites…
20. Well, you’ll have to sell the bike when we have kids anyway!
If you’re brave enough to experiment with too many of these little gems, you’ll need to leave town until the heat dies down.
And when it does…
It might help to see the situation through new eyes:
That motorcycle in the garage is actually a good thing.
It’s one of the many benefits of dating a biker.
The bike doesn’t have to be an obstacle that gets in the way of your relationship.
It can be a way for you to head off on shared adventures.
It can be a source of shared joy, not a topic for another argument.
So what will it be?
Biker dating disaster? Or biker dating bliss?
It all depends on your attitude!
Photo credit: creatista @ Canstockphoto.com