There’s a fine art to biker dating.
It really helps if you don’t see the motorcycle as The Enemy.
Because that’s the path to more arguments than you ever dreamed you could fit into an average week.
Bikers love their motorcycles with a fierce, burning passion.
That’s just the way it is.
The motorcycle is a non-negotiable presence in their lives.
Don’t believe me?
Just try any of these comments, and watch the sparks fly.
You might want to have a bag packed and a plane ticket booked before you do…
20 Things to Never Say When Dating a Biker
1. I’ve just been tidying up your garage: what a mess! No wonder I threw so much away!
2. You’ll never get me on that death machine!
3. It’s like you have another woman out in the garage. You spend more time out there than you do with me!
4. You spent HOW MUCH on new pipes? What a waste of money!
5. You know, I think you love that bike more than you love me.
6. I went through your old bike t-shirts and gave a whole pile to charity.
Some of them actually had holes in them! I don’t know why you were hanging onto them.
7. Why would you possibly need another bike? What a stupid idea!
(This one is a guaranteed conversation killer on any biker date.)
9. Why don’t you sell the bike so we can get a car we can BOTH enjoy?
10. Of course you can’t bring the bike into the house!
Leave it in the garage where it belongs. What’s wrong with you?
11. If you didn’t keep wasting all that money on your bike, we could actually take a vacation.
12. Why don’t you start parking the bike in the driveway, so I have more room for the car in the garage?
13. Can you pick me up after work drinks?
And don’t you DARE show up on the bike in front of my workmates.
14. I saw a guy on a bike today nearly get himself killed.
(This one works as a fantastic ice-breaker on a first biker date.)
15. Do your friends have to come around here on their bikes?
16. Don’t you have any t-shirts that are not motorcycle-related?
17. Isn’t it time you grew out of motorcycles, and just got a car?
18. Does your bike have to be that noisy?
19. You just want a motorcycle because you’re having a mid-life crisis.
(With this line, your first biker date will be your last, by the way.)
And one of my all-time favorites…
20. Well, you’ll have to sell the bike when we have kids anyway!
If you’re brave enough to experiment with too many of these little gems, you’ll need to leave town until the heat dies down.
And when it does…
It might help to see the situation through new eyes:
That motorcycle in the garage is actually a good thing.
It’s one of the many benefits of dating a biker.
The bike doesn’t have to be an obstacle that gets in the way of your relationship.
It can be a way for you to head off on shared adventures.
It can be a source of shared joy, not a topic for another argument.
So what will it be?
Biker dating disaster? Or biker dating bliss?
It all depends on your attitude!
Photo credit: lunamaria @ Canstockphoto.com